The Path of Rum and the Soul

By Mr Badger

"Why is it so dark in here? What do you mean I'm lying on the floor, well that could explain who my mouth feels like an ash tray. Whose round was it? I can't remember, how about you get this one and I'll get the next?"

-Random drunk, Malkavian (maybe?)

Nicknames: Boozers, lushes, alcoholics, pirates, Long John's etc.

History: This path was created by a band of isolated monks deep in the New Zealand wilderness. One day was to change them forever. From out of the mists came a rowing boat piloted by a drunk bearded fellow who preached the joys of Rum to all in the monastery. Convinced this was the way to go they dedicated their lives to finding the inner truth to Rum.

Basic Beliefs: The way to inner peace and harmony is to drink obscene quantities of the dark spirit. The Beast can be tamed if you can no longer stand to frenzy. To truly know Rum you must become Rum in mind and body. Rum is the true spirit of the universe and alcohol is the path to it.

The Ethics of this Path: Rum exists to be drunk. Do not fear final death, it's not as if you'll be feeling anything. Explore the inner nature and purpose of all that is Rum. Study the world through drink tainted eyes and be surprised at the beauty you find. Once the outer world is free of Rum the inner harmony of the universe will be restored.

Hierarchy of sins:

10 Not having a blood alcohol level high enough to fuel jet aircraft.
9 Mixing anything with the Rum, this includes ice and possibly air.
8 Allowing Rum, once found, to see another sunset.
7 Waking up in your own Haven without someone else having put you there during the night, even though your Haven was the Bar you started the evening in.
6 Revelling the night away and still remembering details the next evening.
5 Being sober an any time during the day OR night. Yes kids this means drink up large before bedding down for the day.
4 Not appreciating a really good hangover (it's really a hangunder considering how much you plan to drink that night as well).
3 Drinking liquid in any form that doesn't include alcohol.
2 Walking past a pub without going in for just 'a quick one.'
1 Drinking blood that isn't contaminated with alcohol.

Preferred Disciplines :

Auspex : He seeks Rum here, he seeks Rum there.
Fortitude : Surviving ones own excesses.
Vicissitude : Warping ones body to get at every last drop of Rum in the bottle.
Obtenebration: Power over the drink of shadows.
Dominate : "A double for the gentleman with the strong voice I believe."
Presence : "Why thank you, I'll be having a Rum if you're offering."
Obfuscate : "Who the hell stole my drink?"
Rummery : Well duh!

Description of followers :

Just as the Path of Humanity offers the chance to achieve Golconda does The Path of Rum and the Soul offer the chance to achieve Rumandcoke-onda. When Rumandcoke-onda is achieved the Vampire manages by sheer will to stop her body from processing the alcohol within it or reduce the rate to a crawl. This means the vampire doesn't have to feed as often and stays as drunk as a lord for little effort. Vampires in high states (and I mean high) of Rumandcoke-onda often travel to Jamaica where they grow their hair long and wear Tea cosies on their heads. A person in Rumandcoke-onda is called 'Mon' by others eg "How's it going Mon?" A Vampire experiencing Rumandcoke-onda is said to be 'Jar-moning.'

There is the story of the Antitribu of this Path. These Vampires worship the white spirit and are know as 'Bacardi's' and call each other 'Ron' as part of the worship. Whether any animosity exists between the two groups has yet to be seen.

Views about the other new Path :

"What do these fools think they are doing? Every man and the hair of the dog knows that Coffee sobers you up! These idiots need to be taught a lesson and I'm the person to do it if only someone hadn't stolen my legs! Damn I need a drink!"

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