My eyes open and I reach for her to find no-one there
As I dress all thoughts are of her
The way her bubbling laugh never fails to make me smile
The smell of her skin as we draw close
Her emotions change in tune with my own
I wait for nothing but the taste of her on my lips
Instead I find the house cold and barren
The house is empty, as empty as I now find my heart
I find myself standing like an impotent God amongst the bones of a dead race
Blood marks my trail as my fingernails score my flesh
All that lingers is her smell so I leave as well
All day I think of her
My thoughts wax and wane with the beating of my pulse
It is not long before the ache begins
My body desires the punishment of my mind for its crimes
All thought of work is forgotten as I try to find fault with days past
Was it a smile or a word that has caused me to lose favour?
What had I done?
I vow silently that this will never happen again, but know that it will
People shun me in ignorance of my pain
I answer their scratching voices with equally banal replies
I view the world through a crippled caul of my own making
All is dim and lifeless as am I
The clock seems in torpor as the day drags itself from beginning to end
Eventually I may leave a place I didn't really arrive
I return home thinking of the void awaiting me.
Substitutes bring themselves to my attention but I banish them with a pained
smile
Nothing can replace my love
The pain reminds me how much I lost
I wish I had smothered her with my love, even though this means she would
have left sooner
I beg for not atonement but a chance to begin again once more
As I open the door I sense something familar
A hesitate on the step as this disappointment I could not bare
Soon I can wait no more and enter
I find her in the kitchen, patiently waiting my return
We embrace as my tears fall to the ground
In case you hadn't guessed I really like coffee.
Mr Badger
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